attention M.O.M
This is a peace offering....I come with cake to help you escape the reeducation camps the new regime has relegated you to.
We are here to help....I've only heard stories of what has been going on there. I'm not sure there is any time left.
From what I understand, M.O.M has been infiltrated from with in. No more lawns to tell people to get off. They have taken it from you.
Double agents have informed me that kills and hanger scores will be confiscated.
It's not to late to make run for it before the wall they are building is up.
Once again I'm just coming over here in peace....hurry and escape, before you have no sugar to make cake and stand in long lines for toilet paper.
P.S. The toilet paper line is a long one... Pardon the pun.