I am always reluctant to intervene in matters in my official capacity since I generally lack capacity at any given time. As the riffs grows in our community, I now see the necessity in taking official action. I am prepared to rule on this dispute as the People's Democratic Republic of M.O.M High Minister of Injustice Plenipotentiary and numerous other honorifics.
Lil is a well known agitator and dissident. Normally this would require execution. The PDR of M.O.M's preferred method of execution is death by Betsy. Here is Betsy:
Lucky for Lil, Betsy is on hiatus travelling in the US Virgin Islands trying to recover from her recent setback having been laid off by Ringling Bros. Lil's dissidence and general stirring of the pot aside, the High Court is unable to determine malice aforethought, malice a post thought, or malice during a thought. I looked everywhere and couldn't find that sneaky sumbitch, Malice. The court also failed to prove the existence of an actual thought in the above dispute. The court does find Lil guilty of kerfuffling in the 1st degree. The sentence to be imposed immediately is for Lil to clean up Betsy's yard.
When Betsy returns from hiatus, Lil will paint Betsy's toe nails and participate in other girl bonding activities Betsy may require. Betsy likes Butter London's Scallywag, Lil. Buy it in bulk.
The High Court finds that Bzerk is in fact paranoid. The Court orders that Bzerk present himself to the PDR of M.O.M's Happy Place Acres for psychiatric care. You are to ask for the "Ludwig Van" therapy.
Like a garage sale, all rulings are final.
So saith the Law,
TX LAWMAN