It seems like there are two types of lag.
1. Generic lag for all caused by server reaction time. This you've been addressing by finding faster servers.
2. Individual lag caused by slow connection speed of a particular device. As you say, you can't fix it.
I started to think, if you can't fix 2, then what is the best way to deal with it?
Assumption about how the game works: Each device calculates its new xyz coordinates and xyz velocities, and transmits the parameters at set time intervals to the server, which then broadcasts them to the other devices in the game. Each device then does calculations to predict where the other devices will be, to cover the time until they get a new update of positions. The jumpy effect we see is caused by a longer than normal time period between between a lagging devices transmittions, causing a large discrepancy between predicted data and the new data when it finally arrives
Possible stratagy: Every game has an extra player, a non active dummy player, possibly part of the server. This dummy player accepts the broadcasts, and does the prediction calculations like the other devices. The broadcasts back to each device contains both the other devices positions and where that device is predicted to be.
When a device recieves the dummies prediction where it is expected to be, it compares the parameters to its own values. If the discrepancy is greater than a certain margin, (than a sensible difference expected under normal manouvering), it corrects its own parameters to match the dummies predictions.(or maybe 1/2 way in between), and carries on. Thus if one device is lagging badly, to the other devices its new position is where they predicted it would be, the lagger doesn't jump. The lagger is the one that experiences jumpy motion, which is fairer, seeing he is causing it. A warning message can appear telling him he is lagging and suggest trying different server, and because he is the one experiencing the jumpy behaviour he has incentive to change.
Downside: More lines of code in the device app.
This is all guesswork, maybe my understanding is way off the mark, maybe your doing something like this already....