Welcome to the Island Home For Wayward Kitties Milk and Catnip Rehabilitation Center.

Here we treat the causes of milk and catnip addiction while restoring the feline's state of mind to that of sobriety. Since this is a secret hidden island hideaway, you'll find that there are armed gaurds along the perimiter to prevent any contraband from getting in, as well as prevent our patients from trying to slip away under the cover of darkness. There's plenty of natural wildlife for our patients to hunt, a natural fresh water waterfall in the island's interior, lush foliage everywhere you look and absolutely no distractions from the outside world so we can focus on our patients. Hope to see you here soon cat of doom!

That it HD distract cat before he finds Dave's place if he gets in there we will never see him again and let me say this is a fine service your providing maybe I can send my drunken cat there as well

Yes all felines are welcome here, here kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty.

LOL meeeeeeeeeooooooooowwwwwww wait I don't want to go. ummmm woof woof? Help my squad sent me here hhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeelllllllllllllllllllllpppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp me

Um......this is awkward.....do you take...people? You see, I ran out of...stuff...and my cat had a full bag of nip, so I kind of...rolled one up. One led to another, and another, and now I'm addicted to catnip. I really could use a helping hand, NA asked me to leave and I just have nowhere else to turn.

It's so hard...it's just, so hard.

Cat, if you don't want to be here, I can certainly arrange to help you leave. I can also, if you would rather, arrange for some nice lady cats to be dropped off by the good doctor. Do you need catnip? We have tons of it, and we certainly have the means to deliver it too. Milk? By the ton! Whichever you choose, it will cost you a little bit, but I'm sure we can agree on a reasonable price. Let me know...

Jacklpe wrote: Cat, if you don't want to be here, I can certainly arrange to help you leave. I can also, if you would rather, arrange for some nice lady cats to be dropped off by the good doctor. Do you need catnip? We have tons of it, and we certainly have the means to deliver it too. Milk? By the ton! Whichever you choose, it will cost you a little bit, but I'm sure we can agree on a reasonable price. Let me know...

Yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm that would be perrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrfect how much the most I'll pay is $78907809070050687876699566559996969494939291959696947486970794959697079666995949995555559999556666868706443929933000043449569594945060559966770055994444444676788888899666976888888899999999999999999999998887777777666668888888888101010101010898888888888888888889888969996999999999999696666666666666666666666666

Cat.of.doom wrote:

Jacklpe wrote: Cat, if you don't want to be here, I can certainly arrange to help you leave. I can also, if you would rather, arrange for some nice lady cats to be dropped off by the good doctor. Do you need catnip? We have tons of it, and we certainly have the means to deliver it too. Milk? By the ton! Whichever you choose, it will cost you a little bit, but I'm sure we can agree on a reasonable price. Let me know...

Yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm that would be perrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrfect how much the most I'll pay is $78907809070050687876699566559996969494939291959696947486970794959697079666995949995555559999556666868706443929933000043449569594945060559966770055994444444676788888899666976888888899999999999999999999998887777777666668888888888101010101010898888888888888888889888969996999999999999696666666666666666666666666

It's a deal. Would you like transportation off of this island, or do you need supplies brought in to enhance your stay?

Please send me to the ace hole in a blimp or a carrier

For half I'll send a Limo.....

Cat, the island is like the hotel California: you can check out any time you like but you can never leave. The house takes a fifty percent cut of all the proceeds of contraband trading on the island, piggy, sure humans can come here too, if you don't mind getting clawed up by felines going through catnip withdrawal, Dave, its an island, no roads lead here, just boat or by air but lets make cat comfortable. Send him the tabby. Put it on my tab. Oh and guys, no escape attempts. There's a fully integrated and camouflaged IADS complete with radar AAA and SAMs, armed guards, patrol boats, a carrier with a fleet defense wing, and a battle cruiser. In other words, the island is sealed up tighter than a crabs buttocks but we do provide a valuable service. Once sober, freedom can be obtained through serving as a gladiator in the arena for five years rewards are given for good behavior while escape attempts result in being put in the hole enjoy your stay cat!

[WS]HD wrote: Cat, the island is like the hotel California: you can check out any time you like but you can never leave. The house takes a fifty percent cut of all the proceeds of contraband trading on the island, piggy, sure humans can come here too, if you don't mind getting clawed up by felines going through catnip withdrawal, Dave, its an island, no roads lead here, just boat or by air but lets make cat comfortable. Send him the tabby. Put it on my tab. Oh and guys, no escape attempts. There's a fully integrated and camouflaged IADS complete with radar AAA and SAMs, armed guards, patrol boats, a carrier with a fleet defense wing, and a battle cruiser. In other words, the island is sealed up tighter than a crabs buttocks but we do provide a valuable service. Once sober, freedom can be obtained through serving as a gladiator in the arena for five years rewards are given for good behavior while escape attempts result in being put in the hole enjoy your stay cat!

Have you not noticed what we really do for a living over at the Jolly Roger? What you just described sounds like a normal Tuesday for us. Believe me, we can get the poor cat out of there.

Cat, you ready to go? When you are, we'll send someone to pick you up.

And when you start talking about crabs and buttocks, I think you must've been over at the Doc's place again. Will you ever learn?

Jacklpe wrote:

[WS]HD wrote: Cat, the island is like the hotel California: you can check out any time you like but you can never leave. The house takes a fifty percent cut of all the proceeds of contraband trading on the island, piggy, sure humans can come here too, if you don't mind getting clawed up by felines going through catnip withdrawal, Dave, its an island, no roads lead here, just boat or by air but lets make cat comfortable. Send him the tabby. Put it on my tab. Oh and guys, no escape attempts. There's a fully integrated and camouflaged IADS complete with radar AAA and SAMs, armed guards, patrol boats, a carrier with a fleet defense wing, and a battle cruiser. In other words, the island is sealed up tighter than a crabs buttocks but we do provide a valuable service. Once sober, freedom can be obtained through serving as a gladiator in the arena for five years rewards are given for good behavior while escape attempts result in being put in the hole enjoy your stay cat!

Have you not noticed what we really do for a living over at the Jolly Roger? What you just described sounds like a normal Tuesday for us. Believe me, we can get the poor cat out of there.

Cat, you ready to go? When you are, we'll send someone to pick you up.

Oh ive noticed, but hey, you have the bar, doc has the house of ill repute, why cant i have my island fortress disquised as a rehab center, i mean my island paradise my turf my rules. Besides, its not like he wont be taken care of here

Jacklpe wrote: And when you start talking about crabs and buttocks, I think you must've been over at the Doc's place again. Will you ever learn?

I dont have crabs... scratch scratch scratch

[WS]HD wrote:

Jacklpe wrote: And when you start talking about crabs and buttocks, I think you must've been over at the Doc's place again. Will you ever learn?

I dont have crabs... scratch scratch scratch

Well if you do... Their extar.... .... We've already billed your card. Thanks, enjoy your.... ...oh let's say meal......

I'm ready to leave I'll be on the tallest tree eating cat nip

I thought we sent the robot cat there first, to make sure it was safe

[WS]HD wrote:

Jacklpe wrote:

[WS]HD wrote: Cat, the island is like the hotel California: you can check out any time you like but you can never leave. The house takes a fifty percent cut of all the proceeds of contraband trading on the island, piggy, sure humans can come here too, if you don't mind getting clawed up by felines going through catnip withdrawal, Dave, its an island, no roads lead here, just boat or by air but lets make cat comfortable. Send him the tabby. Put it on my tab. Oh and guys, no escape attempts. There's a fully integrated and camouflaged IADS complete with radar AAA and SAMs, armed guards, patrol boats, a carrier with a fleet defense wing, and a battle cruiser. In other words, the island is sealed up tighter than a crabs buttocks but we do provide a valuable service. Once sober, freedom can be obtained through serving as a gladiator in the arena for five years rewards are given for good behavior while escape attempts result in being put in the hole enjoy your stay cat!

Have you not noticed what we really do for a living over at the Jolly Roger? What you just described sounds like a normal Tuesday for us. Believe me, we can get the poor cat out of there.

Cat, you ready to go? When you are, we'll send someone to pick you up.

Oh ive noticed, but hey, you have the bar, doc has the house of ill repute, why cant i have my island fortress disquised as a rehab center, i mean my island paradise my turf my rules. Besides, its not like he wont be taken care of here

Ok. We got the cat. He's safely home now. I highly suggest paying your security detail commanders a little better in the future. A '81 Mercedes sedan was all it took. Sad really... They brought him right out to our waiting boat.

I love the idea of the island though. The resort for those who either want to get away for a little while, or just drop off of the map business should be very lucrative. In this situation though there were 2 small problems. First, the cat didn't come willingly. Second, he is our customer who pays his bills and is in good standing with us. If he is being held against his will, we have to use our resources to help him out. What kind of friends and neighbors would we be if we refused to help?

If you are planning on keeping the island, please keep us in mind for all of your defensive needs. We have a great stock, we are reliable, and we always come through for our customers. We'd love to have your business.

Thanks!

I wasnt holding him against his will that was the catnip addiction of his! Bring him back im trying to save a feline's life jack! Have you seen where catnip addiction leads? Nowhere nice i can tell you that!

Ok, if he is that serious, we'll talk about it. Cat, do you feel like you need help???

No more of this gladiator stuff though, unless he agrees to it.... I don't want to see our friend mistreated...

If Cat feels his problem is serious, and is too much to handle, we'll have him right back.

Cat??? Your call man.

In the mean time, you have Porkfinger to work on. He should have known he had a problem when he was bragging to his friends about rolling up and smoking a catty...

He wont be mistreated at all. The misfits sent him here for help, i gotta get him clean

And as far as piggy goes, well, lets just say im reminded of that episode of 1,000 ways to die where the stoners smoked poison sumack

[WS]HD wrote: He wont be mistreated at all. The misfits sent him here for help, i gotta get him clean

Alright man. We're gonna bring him back over. But... There are a few folks at the NSA who owe their careers to Manfred. Needless to say, if you don't treat the cat right, we will know. And then we'll call in a few favors elsewhere...

I'm gonna leave his supply of catnip that we had stocked for him with you. I fully expect that a proper step down process will be used also.

Cat, im going to take HD at his word. Hopefully he will help you and be kind to you. If not, use our prearranged signal, and we'll be there within 12 hours to get you.

Good luck man.

No worries jack hes in good hands here

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Wow sounds like my kinda place kinda club Med.like but with all the eerrr ahhh stuff you have will I get more addicted right now carrot juice is king but I have partaken in enjoying some foliage now and then you know carrot tops. That sort of thing money is no object Easter bunny is government work I work one day a year and the rest is vacation time

Bunny, with all the lush natural foliage here, im sure we can provide you with everything you need buddy just try to refrain from laying cadbury eggs all over the island. I figure thats gotta be like a once yearly magic trick you do, just like how santa manages to fit his big keester and sack of presents down the chimney every year