"A Misfit Christmas" -a festive piece of poetry by KappaClaus aka Kappa.

Twas the night before Christmas,
And all through the Acehole,
Not a Misfit was moving,
Not even a muscle.

They were all snuggled up right in their beds,
Except Hulk- whose mattress only fit one leg.

Only Davy was up from a brief winter nap,
Dressed in nothing but his favorite coonskin cap.

Watching the TV and drinking a beer,
And thinking about "taming" his "wild frontier,"

When from above him there came a great bump,
And he immediately sprang to see what was up.

But before he had the chance even to shout,
The fire in the fireplace put itself out.

A shuffling sound came from the chimney above,
Which Davy had no clue as to the source of.

Then a jolly old man scooted out of the flue,
And that jolly old man was- well, you know who.

Over his shoulder he had a huge sack,
Filled with all sorts of great toys and knick-knacks.

For MyNuts, an offer to go to a school.
For Flush, some proverbs on dealing with fools.

For Comet, a warning to change his name,
(For one of his reindeer had one of the same),

For CC, some hope for an actual life
For Dest, some hope for an actual wife,

For B, a great big new bronze "3rd" award,
For Li'l, some roof-proof extra-strength bungee cords.

For them all, a lock they could put on the door,
(For unwanted insects had intruded before),

For Davy, some cream he could put on his arse,
So all of those kisses stopped leaving those marks,

For others, a coupon discount on Skoal,
And for just a couple a few lumps of coal.

And oh, was Santa a sight to be seen,
As he turned to hand Davy an AR-15.

But no sooner had Davy seen the new firearm,
When up from his throat rose a cry of alarm,

83 Misfits' eyes sprung open wide.
83 hands flew down to their sides.

83 Misfits charge down the stairs,
To stop an intruder from taking what's theirs.

The bullets flew fast, and the bullets flew thick,
And all of the bullets poured into Saint Nick.

Round after round poured into the man,
Blood on the floor, and blood on his hands.

Around the room, there rose a great sigh
Of relief. The threat had now been neutralized.

Oh, what a triumph for truth and for light!
A triumph for man's constitutional rights!

When suddenly Pagan let out a cry,
He pointed to Davy, for to their surprise,

A beard from Crockett's fresh face had just sprung,
His belly, once trim, now distended hung.

And to the surprise of the startled beholders,
Santa's robe placed itself on Davy's shoulders.

And, as the entire group sat there gawking,
Davy reached over and pulled down his stocking.

He winked. "I just won't need this anymore,"
He said as he turned and walked out of the door.

Once outside, he spread his arms and floated away,
Towards the roof and the awaiting sleigh.

Santa in a coonskin- now that was a sight,
As Davy called out, now beginning his flight.

"Remember you have constitutional rights!
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

Brilliant!
I'm pasting this into my notes in case it's deleted.
Now take him away to be tortured.

Well guessing you're looking for some oohh ahhh moment. Kudos for spending so much of your time in the real world to plan some big secretly planned moment to gain access into our uber secret society of grown ups. LMFAO, how many days or months of planning to reveal it here for all to see, geez what a waste.

[*M]bzerkbzerk wrote: Well guessing you're looking for some oohh ahhh moment. Kudos for spending so much of your time in the real world to plan some big secretly planned moment to gain access into our uber secret society of grown ups. LMFAO, how many days or months of planning to reveal it here for all to see, geez what a waste.

What?

One breath of fresh air later, this post is gone. Thanks for the support, everybody.

Will just sit back now and continue to read others opinions upon the wasted misguided interpretations made by myself from those whom wisdom flows freely like the uncleansed sparkling bottled water consumed by many all around. Enlighten me please as apparently you know more than I within or outside this realm of cyber with company mostly known by written word.

[*M]bzerkbzerk wrote: Will just sit back now and continue to read others opinions upon the wasted misguided interpretations made by myself from those whom wisdom flows freely like the uncleansed sparkling bottled water consumed by many all around. Enlighten me please as apparently you know more than I within or outside this realm of cyber with company mostly known by written word.

Er...say what?

Ronnie Biggs wrote:

[*M]bzerkbzerk wrote: Will just sit back now and continue to read others opinions upon the wasted misguided interpretations made by myself from those whom wisdom flows freely like the uncleansed sparkling bottled water consumed by many all around. Enlighten me please as apparently you know more than I within or outside this realm of cyber with company mostly known by written word.

Er...say what?

I think it comes down to a simple concept, one not too deeply hidden:

"Lighten up, Francias"

What makes you think bzerk's response wasn't a parody poem too? Geez, how dense dust thou be?

Well written, but I would have mentioned Hulk more. Just my opinion...

Well.hulk at least you got mentioned.again no.love for the bunny.

None for the deadman either rabbit, maybe I need to start ruffling some feathers, or squash a bug.

[M]Flatline wrote: None for the deadman either rabbit, maybe I need to start ruffling some feathers, or squash a bug.

If you clipped some black raptor wings, I'm sure a mention would have been cryptically hidden awaiting a response.

Thoughtful and inspiring

A bloody good laugh-well done and good fun at this time of year.

I wasn't mentioned either Flatline so I'm just going to have a good cry.

[Thugz] KappaClaus wrote: "A Misfit Christmas" -a festive piece of poetry by KappaClaus aka Kappa.

Twas the night before Christmas,
And all through the Acehole,
Not a Misfit was moving,
Not even a muscle.

They were all snuggled up right in their beds,
Except Hulk- whose mattress only fit one leg.

Only Davy was up from a brief winter nap,
Dressed in nothing but his favorite coonskin cap.

Watching the TV and drinking a beer,
And thinking about "taming" his "wild frontier,"

When from above him there came a great bump,
And he immediately sprang to see what was up.

But before he had the chance even to shout,
The fire in the fireplace put itself out.

A shuffling sound came from the chimney above,
Which Davy had no clue as to the source of.

Then a jolly old man scooted out of the flue,
And that jolly old man was- well, you know who.

Over his shoulder he had a huge sack,
Filled with all sorts of great toys and knick-knacks.

For MyNuts, an offer to go to a school.
For Flush, some proverbs on dealing with fools.

For Comet, a warning to change his name,
(For one of his reindeer had one of the same),

For CC, some hope for an actual life
For Dest, some hope for an actual wife,

For B, a great big new bronze "3rd" award,
For Li'l, some roof-proof extra-strength bungee cords.

For them all, a lock they could put on the door,
(For unwanted insects had intruded before),

For Davy, some cream he could put on his arse,
So all of those kisses stopped leaving those marks,

For others, a coupon discount on Skoal,
And for just a couple a few lumps of coal.

And oh, was Santa a sight to be seen,
As he turned to hand Davy an AR-15.

But no sooner had Davy seen the new firearm,
When up from his throat rose a cry of alarm,

83 Misfits' eyes sprung open wide.
83 hands flew down to their sides.

83 Misfits charge down the stairs,
To stop an intruder from taking what's theirs.

The bullets flew fast, and the bullets flew thick,
And all of the bullets poured into Saint Nick.

Round after round poured into the man,
Blood on the floor, and blood on his hands.

Around the room, there rose a great sigh
Of relief. The threat had now been neutralized.

Oh, what a triumph for truth and for light!
A triumph for man's constitutional rights!

When suddenly Pagan let out a cry,
He pointed to Davy, for to their surprise,

A beard from Crockett's fresh face had just sprung,
His belly, once trim, now distended hung.

And to the surprise of the startled beholders,
Santa's robe placed itself on Davy's shoulders.

And, as the entire group sat there gawking,
Davy reached over and pulled down his stocking.

He winked. "I just won't need this anymore,"
He said as he turned and walked out of the door.

Once outside, he spread his arms and floated away,
Towards the roof and the awaiting sleigh.

Santa in a coonskin- now that was a sight,
As Davy called out, now beginning his flight.

"Remember you have constitutional rights!
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

Well done Kappa,
This is sure to be a Christmas favourite..

Uplifting and thought provoking

[Thugz] KappaClaus wrote: "A Misfit Christmas" -a festive piece of poetry by KappaClaus aka Kappa.

Twas the night before Christmas,
And all through the Acehole,
Not a Misfit was moving,
Not even a muscle.

They were all snuggled up right in their beds,
Except Hulk- whose mattress only fit one leg.

Only Davy was up from a brief winter nap,
Dressed in nothing but his favorite coonskin cap.

Watching the TV and drinking a beer,
And thinking about "taming" his "wild frontier,"

When from above him there came a great bump,
And he immediately sprang to see what was up.

But before he had the chance even to shout,
The fire in the fireplace put itself out.

A shuffling sound came from the chimney above,
Which Davy had no clue as to the source of.

Then a jolly old man scooted out of the flue,
And that jolly old man was- well, you know who.

Over his shoulder he had a huge sack,
Filled with all sorts of great toys and knick-knacks.

For MyNuts, an offer to go to a school.
For Flush, some proverbs on dealing with fools.

For Comet, a warning to change his name,
(For one of his reindeer had one of the same),

For CC, some hope for an actual life
For Dest, some hope for an actual wife,

For B, a great big new bronze "3rd" award,
For Li'l, some roof-proof extra-strength bungee cords.

For them all, a lock they could put on the door,
(For unwanted insects had intruded before),

For Davy, some cream he could put on his arse,
So all of those kisses stopped leaving those marks,

For others, a coupon discount on Skoal,
And for just a couple a few lumps of coal.

And oh, was Santa a sight to be seen,
As he turned to hand Davy an AR-15.

But no sooner had Davy seen the new firearm,
When up from his throat rose a cry of alarm,

83 Misfits' eyes sprung open wide.
83 hands flew down to their sides.

83 Misfits charge down the stairs,
To stop an intruder from taking what's theirs.

The bullets flew fast, and the bullets flew thick,
And all of the bullets poured into Saint Nick.

Round after round poured into the man,
Blood on the floor, and blood on his hands.

Around the room, there rose a great sigh
Of relief. The threat had now been neutralized.

Oh, what a triumph for truth and for light!
A triumph for man's constitutional rights!

When suddenly Pagan let out a cry,
He pointed to Davy, for to their surprise,

A beard from Crockett's fresh face had just sprung,
His belly, once trim, now distended hung.

And to the surprise of the startled beholders,
Santa's robe placed itself on Davy's shoulders.

And, as the entire group sat there gawking,
Davy reached over and pulled down his stocking.

He winked. "I just won't need this anymore,"
He said as he turned and walked out of the door.

Once outside, he spread his arms and floated away,
Towards the roof and the awaiting sleigh.

Santa in a coonskin- now that was a sight,
As Davy called out, now beginning his flight.

"Remember you have constitutional rights!
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

Once in the air davy ran into fog, in the fog davy could not see
Rudolph nose would not shine so davy called ATC

The controler davy had called, could not believe he was santa claus
When davy asked what is your name the man said i am cue ball

Well cue ball davy said, am i on radar, this is no joke
Im cold and lost, my beard has ice, please give me hope

Turn left and decend i have you in sight
Your cleared to land what a hell of a night

Sad

Why'd you bump this if you didn't like it, Bud? It's high level shennanigans. Took a lot of effort and thought. I would welcome a clever poem like that targeted at the PDR.

Disclaimer: this is not an endorsement of Mac's work nor meant as an insult to the M's. This was not bumped with the consent or knowledge of the PDR.

Ha! I'd forgotten about this poem. Still think it's hilarious!

Thanks for bringing it up, bhg!

I didn't bring it up grog or bingo did then deleted their post

This is the first time i have seen it. I was out of touch a bit last year.
Whatever the reason it was written, or whatever hidden meanings if any, i thought it was kinda funny.

[*M] MISFIT CROCKETT wrote:

[Thugz] KappaClaus wrote: "A Misfit Christmas" -a festive piece of poetry by KappaClaus aka Kappa.

Twas the night before Christmas,
And all through the Acehole,
Not a Misfit was moving,
Not even a muscle.

They were all snuggled up right in their beds,
Except Hulk- whose mattress only fit one leg.

Only Davy was up from a brief winter nap,
Dressed in nothing but his favorite coonskin cap.

Watching the TV and drinking a beer,
And thinking about "taming" his "wild frontier,"

When from above him there came a great bump,
And he immediately sprang to see what was up.

But before he had the chance even to shout,
The fire in the fireplace put itself out.

A shuffling sound came from the chimney above,
Which Davy had no clue as to the source of.

Then a jolly old man scooted out of the flue,
And that jolly old man was- well, you know who.

Over his shoulder he had a huge sack,
Filled with all sorts of great toys and knick-knacks.

For MyNuts, an offer to go to a school.
For Flush, some proverbs on dealing with fools.

For Comet, a warning to change his name,
(For one of his reindeer had one of the same),

For CC, some hope for an actual life
For Dest, some hope for an actual wife,

For B, a great big new bronze "3rd" award,
For Li'l, some roof-proof extra-strength bungee cords.

For them all, a lock they could put on the door,
(For unwanted insects had intruded before),

For Davy, some cream he could put on his arse,
So all of those kisses stopped leaving those marks,

For others, a coupon discount on Skoal,
And for just a couple a few lumps of coal.

And oh, was Santa a sight to be seen,
As he turned to hand Davy an AR-15.

But no sooner had Davy seen the new firearm,
When up from his throat rose a cry of alarm,

83 Misfits' eyes sprung open wide.
83 hands flew down to their sides.

83 Misfits charge down the stairs,
To stop an intruder from taking what's theirs.

The bullets flew fast, and the bullets flew thick,
And all of the bullets poured into Saint Nick.

Round after round poured into the man,
Blood on the floor, and blood on his hands.

Around the room, there rose a great sigh
Of relief. The threat had now been neutralized.

Oh, what a triumph for truth and for light!
A triumph for man's constitutional rights!

When suddenly Pagan let out a cry,
He pointed to Davy, for to their surprise,

A beard from Crockett's fresh face had just sprung,
His belly, once trim, now distended hung.

And to the surprise of the startled beholders,
Santa's robe placed itself on Davy's shoulders.

And, as the entire group sat there gawking,
Davy reached over and pulled down his stocking.

He winked. "I just won't need this anymore,"
He said as he turned and walked out of the door.

Once outside, he spread his arms and floated away,
Towards the roof and the awaiting sleigh.

Santa in a coonskin- now that was a sight,
As Davy called out, now beginning his flight.

"Remember you have constitutional rights!
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

Once in the air davy ran into fog, in the fog davy could not see
Rudolph nose would not shine so davy called ATC

The controler davy had called, could not believe he was santa claus
When davy asked what is your name the man said i am cue ball

Well cue ball davy said, am i on radar, this is no joke
Im cold and lost, my beard has ice, please give me hope

Turn left and decend i have you in sight
Your cleared to land what a hell of a night

I forgot about this to, he did an excellent job and of course my part was especially good

Ahm... ok, BHG.

Sure does look like you brought it up. Not sure why you find it sad. Other than you weren't mentioned? I'd like to say that I wish I was, but I'm pretty sure it would only be something like I crapped on a rug

think Bud brought it up and thinks its sad for this reason

D

Misfits Christmas, destined to be a holiday classic